the burning inside

I just want him to call me.  Not to rekindle any love (that only I thought was there) but I want to talk to him - make certain we can still hang out as friends or at least hang out in the same circles without any awkwardness.  But he hasn't called me back... and I don't know why.  THAT is the burning inside - the curiosity as to why he won't call me back, the sadness to think he doesn't want to call me back, the frustration of not  being able to call him again to better explain why I want to see him.  There is no love in this blog... or maybe the love is my own... the love I feel towards him, not as a boyfriend but as a friend - wanting to make the best of our experience and relationship.  He'll never know.  

At least I come away from this knowing I am a stronger, better, wiser woman for having dealt with this relationship the way I have.  I know I have it in me to work for a relationship I truly believe in... I know I can deal, gracefully, with rejection.  I know that my love for myself is greater than I imagined in times of loneliness and my soul's connection to this universe only gets stronger when presented with a challenge.